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Relationships: 5 Ways to Apologize


Because we are relational beings we tend to offend others and step on each other’s toe but then if we want to maintain a peaceful life and continue to enjoy our relationship with them we must know how to apologize. And because we are different and unique, each of us has a way of which we want the apology to be expressed.

No wonder sometimes we apologize and it seems the other person is not satisfied. It’s not that you didn’t apologize just that you didn’t express it in the language they will understand. You must therefore understand the apology language of the other person in other for both of you to be reconciled.

Therefore let me share with you five ways you express apology
Expressing Regret: "I am sorry." "I feel badly that my behavior has hurt you so deeply." This language identifies with the emotions of the offended party.

Accepting Responsibility: "I was wrong." Name your mistake and accept fault. "I should not have done that. There's no excuse. What I did was wrong."

Making Restitution: "What could I do to make this right? How can I make amends to you? How could I restore your confidence in me?"

Genuine Repentance: "I'll try not to do that again." Repentance doesn't make rash promises, such as "I promise I'll never do it again if you'll forgive me." However, repentance does express the desire to change one's behavior. "I don't want this to continue happening. Help me think of ways I can change my behavior."

Requesting Forgiveness: "Will you please forgive me?" This language expresses humility. "I realize I can't restore this relationship alone. It will require mercy on your part, but my sincere desire is that you will forgive me and we can continue our relationship."

Please stop making the mistake of using the word but in your apologies. Anytime you say, "I'm sorry, but if you hadn't …. then, I wouldn't …" you've negated your apology. You end up blaming the other person for your wrong behavior. Now you owe a second apology!

Have a nice weekend and don’t forget to make peace with anyone you have issues with.

Got any question, comment or observation? Send it to ableabayomi@gmail.com

©theINSIGHT 2015
@ableabayomi


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